moving forward, being me
i know, kind of an odd title for a post- i mean, isnt everything i've been doing lately a part of moving forward and being me?
i wonder, why is being "me" so hard for me to be? i mean, "me" is not a horrible terrible person. "me" is actually a warm caring individual with a lot to offer. Yes "me" makes mistakes and has bad days and rough times, but that is just like every other person on the planet. So, why then, is being "me" so difficult for me? What happened to me that i spend my whole life thinking "me" is a horrible, terrible person? And more importantly, how do i go about changing that perception so that i can embrace "me" and enjoy "me" and accept "me"? More than anything, i wish i could do that. i wish i could fogive "me" for all the things in my past that i have not been able to let go of. i wish i could get past them. Not around them, not run away from them, but face them and work through them, and then allow them to be the piles of rubble i worked through on the sides of the path i continue to walk forward. There are many things i have almost forgiven "me" for- and many more that i have not even come close. i suppose in time i will somehow learn to do that. it's just so paralyzing sometimes...
oh well....as my title says- moving forward- i know that there will come a time when the past will be worked through, when those piles of rubble will be there, and i will be able to move forward even better than i have already started. Did you ever realize that forward can be a slow process? Do you suppose it's worth the wait?
i wonder, why is being "me" so hard for me to be? i mean, "me" is not a horrible terrible person. "me" is actually a warm caring individual with a lot to offer. Yes "me" makes mistakes and has bad days and rough times, but that is just like every other person on the planet. So, why then, is being "me" so difficult for me? What happened to me that i spend my whole life thinking "me" is a horrible, terrible person? And more importantly, how do i go about changing that perception so that i can embrace "me" and enjoy "me" and accept "me"? More than anything, i wish i could do that. i wish i could fogive "me" for all the things in my past that i have not been able to let go of. i wish i could get past them. Not around them, not run away from them, but face them and work through them, and then allow them to be the piles of rubble i worked through on the sides of the path i continue to walk forward. There are many things i have almost forgiven "me" for- and many more that i have not even come close. i suppose in time i will somehow learn to do that. it's just so paralyzing sometimes...
oh well....as my title says- moving forward- i know that there will come a time when the past will be worked through, when those piles of rubble will be there, and i will be able to move forward even better than i have already started. Did you ever realize that forward can be a slow process? Do you suppose it's worth the wait?
posted by oreo at
10:18
1 Comments:
how? how do you let go of that which has fueled you your whole life? how do you fogrive yourself for things you have never been punished for- never been held accountable for? i dont know how to do that- i have tried, over and over, but it just doesnt seem to work.
By
oreo, at 11:29 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home